“It was love at first sight, at last sight, at ever and ever sight.”
“The more you love a memory, the stronger and stranger it is.”
“I think like a genius, I write like a distinguished author, and I speak like a child.”
“Life is a great surprise. I do not see why death should not be an even greater one.”
“You can always count on a murderer for a fancy prose style.”
“The cradle rocks above an abyss, and common sense tells us that our existence is but a brief crack of light between two eternities of darkness.”
“Lolita, light of my life, fire of my loins.”
“Middle age is when you’re sitting at home on a Saturday night and the telephone rings and you hope it isn’t for you.”
“Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other who never forgets them.”
“Progress was all right once, but it has gone on too long.”
“Bankers are just like anybody else, except richer.”
“I think that I shall never see a billboard lovely as a tree.”
“Happiness is having a scratch for every itch.”
“People who work sitting down get paid more than people who work standing up.”
“The cow is of the bovine ilk; one end is moo, the other milk.”
“A door is what a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of.”
“Candy is dandy, but liquor is quicker.”
“If we are intended for great ends, we are called to great hazards.”
“To be deep in history is to cease to be Protestant.”
“Fear not that your life shall come to an end, but rather fear that it shall never have a beginning.”